For lack of anything better to do...

From Anton,

RULES:
1. Put your birth month in an entry.
2. Strike out anything that doesn't apply to you.
3. Put on bold the four that best apply to you.
4. And put the months in lj cuts. (Link it to another page...In my case, Anton's blog. Hehe. Hope you don't mind, Anton...)

(MONTHS)

FEBRUARY: Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Wants to realize dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.

* * * *

I posted this "month" thingie a while back...but this puts a little twist to it, I think. Looking at the words I struck out and comparing them to the words I highlighted, I can only come to one conclusion...tamad ako. Hehehe. Or maybe I'm just leaning towards that statement because I'm so sick of going to work. I want a vacation. Kahit a *longer* CHRISTMAS VACATION lang, please. :(

EYE CANDY: Why You Should Attend Your College Homecoming Bash

In my 5 years in Arki, I have always maintained that our college has the highest percentage of good-looking people in all of U.P. As I look back, I think that that theory was brought on, not by my personal observations, but by the remarks of my non-Arki friends.

Yeah, sure there are a lot of good-looking people in Arki...but seeing all of them in a daily basis (back in college) kind of ruined the hype for me. Seeing them after they've pulled an all-nighter for a plate really distorts the image, too. :D

But it's been awhile since I've seen these so-called *good-looking people*...and seeing them - ALL of them - last night at the Homecoming, was a real eye-opener.

I used to dread running into my past...mostly because I've done a lot of stupid things before. But the Homecoming reminded me that a blast from the past could be a good thing too. Kinda like reminiscing about highschool...seeing old friends...and seeing all your past crushes. Haha.

I saw...
~my first-ever college crush...(itago nalang natin sha sa pangalang "Edgar")
~my teacher crushes (codenames: Alex and Francis. Haha.)
~my rugged boy crush (codename: Johnny Walker)
~my hard-to-reach / you're-so-yummy / ultimate Arki heartthrob crush (codename: Brad Pitt)
~my friend-turned-hunk-so-now-crush-ko-na-sha crush (codename: Lucky)
~countless EYE CANDY. In Mia's words..."Yum."

I felt like a kid at a candy store.

That was fun. And it's nice that I didn't have many of those "Yuck, naging crush ko yan noon?!?" comments (hmmm...save for 2, maybe). Well, at least not for ALL of my past crushes. I would have been very worried about my judgement if that were the case. *brrr*

In other words, kahit may mga "sablay," marami paring "panalo." (and ultimate Arki heartthrob was a true winner...)

Early Morning Happiness

In the 5 months that I've been working in the office, I've always been the early bird. I would come to work at 7 a.m. (very much against my will), and I'd surf the net or take a nap until 8:30 when the official work day starts.

However, the Internet access of all the Juniors was removed (I cannot begin to explain my bitterness over that issue. But that's another story. *grin*), so I've resorted to early morning napping, doing the daily crossword (a newly ressurrected habit), or reading a good book.

This morning, I arrived at 7 a.m., as usual. But I felt too relaxed (but not at all sleepy) to just sit around waiting for 8:30 to roll around. So I went and did something I don't normally do (crazy, in my standards)...I went over to Starbucks to treat myself.

Walking around Makati (the nearest Starbucks to our office is quite a walk away), early in the morning is quite relaxing. No traffic. No crowds. The early morning sunshine mingled with the crisp, pre-Christmas air...there's only one word for it: invigorating.

Walking around a bustling city, strutting around in really nice clothes, and hearing your heels make this sharp click click sound, really gives you this adrenaline rush. It makes me realize that, hey...life is pretty good. It makes me want to splurge on a tall White Chocolate Mocha and a chocolate Belgian waffle. *yum* Full of calories and fat...but still *yum*. And I'm only a few sips away from the really pretty Starbucks Planner (I want it I want it I want it).

I'll think about the big dent it makes on my daily income later...For now, I am still trying to bask in the glow of my early morning happiness. Only 2 more minutes to go till the stress begins...I better make the most of it...

Infiltrated

How do I get rid of this SEARCHMIRACLE crap? Aaaagh! It is totally ANNOYING me. I can't get my Ad-Aware or SpyDoctor programs to get rid of it!!! It compromises my Explorer links (whenever I click on links it redirects me to their searchmiracle page!); an annoying searchbar pops up everytime I open an new Explorer window...it's totally freaky! I hate it.

*HELP ME!!!*

Love Songs for Everyone

Love is always an easy topic to write about. As Mia said in her blog, love (unrequited or not), is one of the "baduy forces" that drive people to write (to sing...to cry...to do any crazy stunt possible). If you listen to the radio, chances are that most of the top ten hits are love songs. Why? Because for every hopeless romantic song writer in the world, there are about 10,000 other people who can relate to their songs.

I'm sure that every person, at one time, has experienced the "Killing Me Softly" syndrome. That feeling of unexpected hopelessness when you hear a random song over the radio, and you say, "Ouch. I've felt that...I'm feeling that." Sometimes, some people experience the "You're So Vain" syndrome, wherein you proclaim (out of bitterness, usually), "Hah. Yan siguro kanta nya for me...." Well and good if the song that's playing is "I Wish You Were Here." Too bad for pathetic you if it's "I Never Really Loved You Anyway."

I have always been a hopeless romantic. Even I will own up to compiling songs that seem so real at that time, but are so baduy when I listen to them, say, now? (Note to Leni: I am currently listening to my Break-Up CD compilation. It reeks of Vonda Shepard, Boyz II Men and - gasp - Fralippolippi! Let me ask you..."What was I thinking?") But maybe that's the trick...maybe considering love songs as baduy means that you've moved on because you can't relate to them anymore. :)

I came across this article in Young Star, and every word I read gave a small little tug somewhere inside (my stomach? Oh wait...my heart? Harhar!). I'm sure that most of you can relate to some of the words here, too (sige na, wag na mag-deny...). Enjoy.

* * * *

Love Songs For Us Rejects

by Regina Belmonte

Coldplay said it well in just two lines. “So I look in your direction / But you pay me no attention, do you?” They said it even better in another three. “I’ll always be waiting for you / So you know how much I need you / But you never even see me, do you?” I never mistook Shiver for a happy, upbeat song, as deceptive as it may have been. No, Shiver was always on of my many songs of unrequited love, of infatuation and the imminent rejection, and of the desolation in the aftermath.

I find a strange kind of joy in songs about desperate crushes and failed romances. They remind me that I'm not alone in this singular solitude, in this lack of so-called significant other. It's no longer of major consequence to me, but at some point in my juvenile past, I supposed I was hooked by stories of fairytale romances and reams come true. [...]

…For your perusal, a list of some of my favorite songs to listen to when I’m feeling unfortunately single, unfortunately unloved and unwanted, and / or unfortunately invisible – in no particular order.

1) Moving – Kjwan
Why am I always the one moving on?
Slow and bittersweet, plaintive and pleading, that one line speaks volumes. Why am I always left distraught? Why are you so unaffected?

2) Burnout – Sugarfree
O kay tagal kitang minahal. Tinatawag kita. Sinusuyo kita. Di mo man marinig, di mo man madama. O kay tagal din kitang mamahalin.
Love songs always seemed so much more eloquent in Filipino; so pure and sincere. Unrequited love at its finest.

3) Una – Sponge Cola
Maiiwasan ba ang bawat sandaling ika’y laman ng isip ko? Nararapat bang pigilan ang damdamin na lalong mahulog sa iyo? Sa pagkaakit at ‘di paglapit, nananalangin at umaasa.
The desperation in this song has made it one of my favorites from this new band. Thinking about the oblivious object of your obsession seems almost unavoidable sometimes. I know, deep down, that these fantasies will never come true, but I can’t stop myself from thinking them up, either, and in the end, I’m the one who ends up hurt.

4) Hara Kiri – Plane Divides the Sky
It’s time for things to go, but I’m feeling, but I’m bleeding. You will never come, but I’m waiting here. It’s time for you to go, but I’m needing, so I’m fighting. It’s now, I have to live, but I’m dying here.
More desperation. This song is a bit louder than the others that will be found on the list but is nevertheless, equally passionate.

5) Tea and Sympathy – Jars of Clay
It’s not the way that it has to be. Don’t trade our love for tea and sympathy. We can work it out.
And even more desperation. Pleading seems to be the trend with sons like these, but Tea and Sympathy has always been particularly beautiful to me; a song about one’s need to find closure, and another’s apathy.

6) Haligh, Haligh, A Lie – Haligh, Bright Eyes
But now we speak with ruined tongues and the words we say aren’t meant for anyone, it’s just a mumbled sentence to a passing acquaintance but there was once you. You said you hate my suffering and you understood and you’d take care of me. You’d always be there, well, where are you now?
The song is bitter to its very core; from the tone in which it is sung to the very words it uses. (How many songs incorporate a sarcastic “Ha ha ha,” anyway to full effect?)

7) Himala – Rivermaya
Himala. Kasalanan bang humingi ako sa langit ng isang himala?
We who want cannot help making futile wishes, and the melancholy of this song mirrors that longing exactly. Is it wrong to want? Is it wrong to dream? Even when it hurts?

8) That I Would Be Good – Alanis Morissette
That I would be good, even if I lost sanity. That I would be good, whether with or without you.
This entire song should be listened to over and over and over again, if only because its lyrics are exactly how anyone feels. Who doesn’t want to be loved, despite his or her flaws? I can only be certain that love is real when it accepts me for everything that I am, the good and the bad.

9) Forget Her – Jeff Buckley
Tell yourself over and over you won’t ever need her again. But don’t fool yourself; she was heartache from the moment that you met her. My heart is frozen still as I try to find the will to forget her, somehow.

10) 3 Libras – A Perfect Circle
Because I threw you the obvious. You don’t see me. You don’t see me at all.

As I listen to some of these songs, I can’t help wondering why love is such a common topic in music. I can’t understand how a concept so abstract and difficult to grasp; indeed, nearly impossible to define, could have inspired countless arias of complete, absolute emotional abandon. I supposed I’ll find out someday.

For now, I have my youth and my own life to live. Love can (and will) come at the right time. Until it decides to rear its ugly head, however, I shall sit in front of my computer and enjoy all the beautiful music spawned by the sheer honesty of raw emotion and the poignancy of heartbreak. Sometimes, I’ll catch myself smirking sardonically about how silly love can be. And other times, I’ll feel my chest burn. “I’ve felt that,” I’ll say, experiencing an oddly nice kind of depression. “I know how you feel,” says the music in reply. “You feel alive.”

- Taken from Young Star, The Philippine Star. Friday, November 19, 2004.

Survivor: Divisoria

Going to Divisoria on a holiday before Christmas is like going willingly to hell on earth. It's like hell (as I can imagine it to be), because it presents you with all sorts of tempting goodies (everything is sold at half the price they're selling it for in Greenhills!), it's HOT, and you are surrounded by demons (snatchers, smugglers).

Let me put it this way...going to Divisoria on a holiday before Christmas is like going to Binondo during Chinese New Year's; like going to Dangwa during Valentine's Day; like riding the MRT during rush hour. It's THAT crowded. Sometimes I imagine that it's even worse.

For the inexperienced, do not dare venture into Divisoria (even with the lure of good bargains), unless you are well-informed and well-prepared. Here are a few tips to help ease the culture shock:

1. Wear your most comfortable shoes. Favorably not open-toed shoes; much better if you wear rubber shoes. This will prevent your toes from being stomped on (it can happen at least once every minute). And you need to make your feet as happy as possible so you can get better mileage inside the Divisoria Mall.

2. Wear bright clothing. If you're going with a group, it's best to wear something that is easily distinguishable in a crowd. That way, your companions can easily spot you when you get separated (recommended for the vertically-challenged, most especially). If you're tall, it's ok to wear dull-colored clothes (especially if you hate getting attention...like me). You can be the one who spots the person in the bright-colored shirt.

3. Do not bring a purse / handbag. If you really need something to put your stuff in, bring a beltbag (if you don't mind looking like a Divi saleslady), or bring a body bag that hangs close to your body, and make sure that you always place it in front of you.

4. Bring lots of cash. But place it inside your jeans pocket...or someplace that's hard to snatch. There are ATMs around the area, but the lines are long. You don't want to cut on precious shopping time, do you?

5. Do not drive your own car. Get the driver to drive it. Finding a parking space is close to impossible. And it helps to have someone bring your first round of shopping bags to the car so you can have your hands free for the next round. :D Do not attempt to commute. Going home in a jeep with all of the stuff you're bound to buy is sure to be an unpleasant experience.

6. Establish a shopping route. If you're going to shop at the Divisoria Mall, be prepared to get lost in a labyrinth of alleys that look exactly alike. It's better to be systematic about it (and to make sure that everybody else you're with knows how the system works) so you can make the most of your trip (and so noone gets lost).

7. Don't be too picky. It's OK to canvass for the best price. But in Divisoria, the prices only differ from one another in fives or tens. That shouldn't matter much, especially if you think that it's still cheaper than the Greenhills version by about 50. Besides, if you think you can still find the stall that sells it at the cheapest price, best of luck to you. Better buy it while you've still got the chance.

8. Be prepared to die. The Divisoria Mall is an Ozone waiting to happen. There are no fire exits (none I can see, anyway), and some of the merchants actually have the nerve to smoke inside the building, what with all their wares being flammable. And with the tons of people inside, it will be no surprise to me if one will die, not from the fire itself, but from the stampede it will inevitably cause.

9. Do not curse or scowl each time you get trod on or pushed. Chances are, you will have used every swear word there is in only an hour's time, and that scowl will be a permanent feature on your face. There is NEVER a time when there will be no pushing, or no toe-stepping, so get used to it. And don't complain. Try to do some of your own pushing and stepping-on-toes, maybe that will make you feel a teensy bit better. Hehehe. ;)

10. Think happy thoughts. You're going to need every single one of them, especially if you plan on keeping your temper in check.

* * * *

Do not let these tips scare you. Shopping at Divisoria may be a hellish experience...but it's definitely worth it. I spent around PhP2000 today...and with that amount of money, I got a lot of really nice stuff (shoes, a jacket, jogging pants, accessories...etc). I remember my very FIRST journal entry (please see my Blurty for reference), about one of my shopping binges, wherein I spent around PhP2600 on just TWO tops and ONE sweater. Yep. My Divisoria shopping day was definitely worth it. :)

It's too bad that I have yet to finish my Christmas shopping...It's hard to shop for other people when you see a lot of stuff that YOU like for yourself. *sigh*

Active Lifestyle

I've been going on and on about how I want to lose weight...I've listed all of the things I should do...and all of the things I should stay away from.

Unfortunately, I've been violating all the food rules...it's hard to keep away from good food for long. :( One day last week, I was so depressed at work that I ate up most of the chocolate mallows in my food supply. That same day, Mark took me out to a Tempura dinner to cheer me up...and he bought me decadent chocolate cream pie at Brewing Point, because he knows that I'm totally inlove with that stuff. All of my hard work went down the drain (and all the fat came in its place) just in one day of stuffing myself with good, good food. *sigh*

The good news is, I've been religiously fulfilling my activity rules. :) I've been doing crunches everyday...and I'm slowly starting up an active lifestyle to keep me fit. :D

BADMINTON: Last Friday, Diane and I went to Club Badminton to try out the sport that's been the rage for the past year. It's true what they say: you'll really sweat buckets even after 30 minutes of playing badminton. In my case, though, I was sweating (and my face was all red! woohoo, tisay. harhar) because I was embarrased beyond belief. I suck at badminton. Well, considering that it was my first time to play, I guess it should be excusable. However, having the shuttle cock fall harmlessly to the ground everytime I try to serve the damn thing...it's humiliating. I was ready to surrender right then and there.

But...after an hour of playing, I am proud to say that I have improved. Sure, I may have gotten more exercise in stooping down to get the shuttle cock...but at least I've learned to serve properly...without missing, mind you. I'm definitely looking forward to the next game...as soon as my arm stops aching...

BASKETBALL: I've been thinking of playing basketball again. I truly enjoyed my summer when I took up Women's Basketball for my 5th P.E. subject. However, there isn't much opportunity for me to play basketball with anyone, anywhere. (anyone up for a game? Open to females only, please. Hehe)

Just a few hours ago, after stuffing myself (again) with a dinner of garlic rice and cheesy SPAM (yummm), I picked up a basketball and asked my sister to shoot some hoops with me outside our house. A while later, my cousin from across the street challenged us to a two-on-two game. It was the girls against the boys...my little sister and I on one team...my little brother and my cousin on the other. In the end, the Assumptionistas won 10 to 9 against the Ateneans. HAH! And the fact that the other team was composed of 10 year old boys didn't matter...;p Haha. We may have been taller...but they were better shooters...and man, are they heavy. ;p

BOWLING: Ok...so it's not exactly a very strenuous sport. But I love bowling. It's fun. :) It doesn't make me sweat, but at least my arm is getting toned from carrying around an 11-pound ball. :D

* * * *

I guess I'm just happy that I'm getting to be all sporty. It's nice. You should try it. As Elle from Legally Blonde says..."Exercise gives you endorphins. Endorphins make you happy! And happy people just don't kill their husbands, they just don't." Riiight. :D

This happy business isn't bad at all. :)

Driving for Fitness

For the next 7 weeks before Christmas, I am aiming to lose 5 lbs or more...for the purpose of creating enough allowance to gain more weight during the holidays. (Haha. Just kidding) I want to lose weight because most of the clothes I own hardly fit me anymore. From an RTW size-Medium, I am now a Large...and I'm hating it.

Looking at me at first glance, one may not notice the weight gain. Everytime I complain out loud that I am too fat, or everytime I proclaim that I'm on a diet, the people around me give me this weird look as if to say "Are you crazy? If you think you're fat, what am I? An elephant?" A few years back (around 3rd year college), I gained some weight, too...but it was so obvious then: my arms were fat, my thighs were fat, my FACE was fat. That was why everybody seemed to notice it.

Now, all I do is sit around for 8 hours a day. I eat my lunch without leaving my workstation. I only get up to go to the comfort room, or to go get something from the common printer. That way, my face and my arms remain small and thin...my tummy and my hips have become super sized. Because of these recent...uhh..developments, I have drafted a to-do list to help me lose the flab:

1. Go jogging every Saturday and Sunday morning
2. Do crunches once a day (twice every weekend)
3. Play golf / go to the driving range
4. Play badminton every Friday
5. No carbs after 6 p.m.!!!
6. No junkfood

So far, I've already violated rule #1 (I wasn't able to wake up on time). I semi-fulfilled rule #2 (I do crunches everday, but I failed to do them twice a day this past weekend). I have SERIOUSLY violated rule #5 (I was hungry!)...as well as rule #6 (who can resist a bar of Twix?). Gaaaah! I'm hopeless.

However, I was able to go to the driving range this weekend. I decided to add golf to my list of sports because it's the most convenient sport to have if you belong to my family. Boring as it may sound, golf is the Espiritu family's passion. My dad took up golf back when I was in highschool. Soon after that, my mom (who got tired of getting left behind everytime my dad went on out-of-town golf trips), took up the sport. Heck, the whole Espiritu CLAN, organizes its own golf tournament every December. Even my relatives from the States come home just to join the darn thing.

Anyway, back in 3rd year HS, I decided to see what all the fuss was about. I took golf lessons. All I remember from that time was that I got a pretty good workout just from standing for an hour trying to hit golf balls. That was what compelled me to try driving for fitness...the promise of sweating profusely (and losing some weight in the process).

Yesterday, I remembered all the things I hate about golf. I remember how I can't move my fingers after gripping the club for a few minutes, and how my dad always tells me not to hold the club too tightly. I remember how my golf club makes this clumsy swish-thunk sound upon hitting the ball (and the ground), instead of the swish-thwack sound that my dad always produces when he plays. I remember how my ball never quite reaches the 100-yard mark, and I remember the disappointment (and the utter embarrassment) of not hitting the ball at all.

And now, on the day after, I am reminded of all the pain that comes with attempting to play golf with the wrong form: I can't raise my arms, my hands are beginning to cramp, and my mid-section is sore.

But that's the price I have to pay for being vain.

Hopefully all of this fitness craziness will pay off. I will not buy any new clothes until I can fit into all of my old ones. :p

Rush hour?

It was a miracle.

I was able to drive from Cainta to Makati in 25 minutes. Yep. You read that right. 25 MINUTES.

Not bad, considering that Saturdays are supposed traffic days in the metro (believe me, after traversing from my house to Makati everyday, Saturdays are a walk in the park compared to Monday and Friday traffic).

Apparently, it's never traffic going to Makati on Saturdays (and most probably, Sundays) during the daytime.

Either that or I have this knack of weaving expertly through traffic at 80 kph, just because I'm late for OT. :D

* * * *

My Outlook Express is screwy. It hangs whenever I open it. It just teases me with an Inbox (10) tag in the side scroll menu, but it won't actually show the Inbox window. After a few minutes, the Windows Task Manager says that the application is Not Responding. And I am stuck with a feeling of longing for the 10+ messages waiting for me in my Inbox.

How am I supposed to fix this?!? ARGH! I know I've encountered this problem before...but I've done every imaginable fixer-upper (System Restore, Virus Check, Disk Defragmenter, whatever!), and it won't work!

*help me*

FINALLY!!! :)

I am finally a REGULAR employee at RMJM Philippines, Inc.

After 3 months and 3 weeks of being a Technical Trainee, I have been "promoted" to Graduate Architect status (just some fancy schmancy name for "regular-employee-who-hasn't-taken-the-board-exam-yet").

Just wanted to share my good news. :)
*yessss*

Beware of the Desperate

*Due credit goes to Risha, who has such interesting topics to write about in her blog, thus inspiring me to write this entry. ;)

I have always believed that all women have a natural bitchiness that is brought out by certain things. There are those who choose to flaunt this side of themselves to the world; some who are pros without trying too hard; and some, like me, who tend to keep this trait recessive...who choose to bring out the bitch only when they have to, and most importantly, when they need to.

I bring out the bitch in me as a defense mechanism: when people block my way (walking or driving, it doesn't make a difference); when it's that time of the month and I don't feel like being cheerful; and most especially when there are stalkers-slash-psychos-slash-losers hovering around me (figuratively and literally).

I know most girls have experienced being ogled in public, especially while passing a construction site, or even while walking around a mall. Some guys have no shame whatsoever. Most girls I know react in almost the same way: they raise their eyebrows and glare at the culprit(s), cursing under their breath. That's already a mild form of bitchiness. What more if guys take one step further from ogling? Is stalking enough reason to bring out Cruella de Vil?

* * * *

For a stalker-free life...Do not promise friendship to someone who is clearly obsessed with attaining something more than that. The term friends may as well be synonymous to the terms puwede pa! in the mind of the desperate. And do not be so quick to reply "Who's this?" to random texters.

* * * *

My friends say that I attract weirdos because I'm too *nice*. People take advantage of the fact that I can never say no to little favors, or that I want to be friends with everyone. I have this twisted theory that everyone can be friends after anything: "You lied to me, but we can still be friends!"; "You hurt me so badly...but we can still be friends!"; "I don't like you in THAT way, but we can still be friends!"

But when delusional people mistake "friendship" as a bridgeway for something more...well that's not my fault anymore, is it? If they'd only take a minute to look up the word "friend" in the dictionary...Yeesh.

In situations like these, people shouldn't be surprised that there are a lot of bitches in the world. Women need to protect themselves, somehow. If not with the hard punch, then with the sharp tongue and with looks that could kill.

A get together with college friends at Di Mark's, Greenbelt 4. (the exact same picture is also posted on Mumty's and Joyce's blogs). From L to R: Janrey, Mikey, Anna, Joyce, Mumty, ME, and Mia. :) In the middle: Yummy pizza, pasta, and a basket of chicken croquetas. ;)

A few more minutes till Stress

This weekend has been the most relaxing weekend I've ever had.

/me closes her eyes and tries to bring back all the happy thoughts before starting another stressful week at work.

Last Friday, I met up with my college friends at Greenbelt 4. I wasn't expecting too many people...just Mikey and Mumty and myself since we're the ones who work around Makati. But surprises of all surprises, we were 7 all-in-all.

So what's new with everyone?

Mikey is still in the insurance business...he's on a diet, and he has inspired me to start a diet as well. Hahaha. Nothing as masochistic as the SouthBeach diet, though (God-forbid!).

Mumty is now a regular at the firm she's in...Congratulations! Inggit ako!

Joyce and Mia sound like they're having a blast at R.R. Payumo. Mia was greeted a Happy Birthday by Ethan of Survivor. I'm betting that 2004 is Mia's best birthyear ever.

Anna says she's still not a regular...But we all point out that her salary is more than the regular employees at our firms. Hehe.

Janrey is still the robot-that-could, snapping up sidelines here and there. :D

* * * *

I woke up early the next day (Saturday) to go jogging with my Mee. But after eating yummy Chicken Croquetas, pizza and pasta (at Di Mark's), and having a [free] Figaro Cappucino Frost the night before, I didn't really think that an hour of walking could do the trick. So we just gave up, ate rice, sisig and spaghetti for breakfast, and dropped dead for around 4 hours.

I had a relaxing Sunday with my siblings Laurence and Larissa (Levs was, as usual, on his own). I went shopping for diet food (tuna and fruit), then I enjoyed my carbo-loading hour while watching Shark Tale.

That evening, Michelle came by the house to pick up her reimbursements and her paycheck from Ma'am. You should see her. She's darker (golden!), she's THINNER (I swear, she looked almost petite! She actually looked smaller...as if the weight loss also caused her to shrink a few inches in height. Hehe), and she has BANGS. Hehehe. :) It was so good to see her again. Next time she's back from Palawan, she promises to plan the Makati dinner. :) *yay*

* * * *

In around 25 minutes, the work day will officially start. My group's OT will officially start today, and will end sometime in the middle of December. That means that my days of fun, relaxation and sanity are officially OVER. No more Friday-night gimiks. No more free Saturdays...

Not unless I play hooky every once in a while. ;) Ha!

Uninspired

I don't feel particularly inspired as I write this entry. I feel listless, grumpy, lazy and annoyed all at the same time: not exactly a foundation for my usual *random whimsy.*

Nothing particularly interesting has happened to me in the past few days...Hmmm. Except maybe for the Oktober fest I attended at the German Club in Makati, along with a few AF people and Sir Mata. Yep. Interesting, maybe...Inspiring? Not really.

So what exactly inspires me? What makes me feel energetic, happy, dilligent and content?

• The beach. Uh...Let's see...Vinyl flooring underneath me, not sand; fluorescent lights above me, not the sun; air-conditioner, not balmy sea breezes. Nope. Definitely not inspiring.
  
  
• A good book. Aside from P.S. I Love You by Cecilia Ahern (READ IT! It's charming.), I haven't done much good reading lately (blogs don't really count as books, do they?).
  
  
• Good food. Temporary inspiration. After pigging out on my favorite food, I feel the fat settling on my hips and I'm just left feeling digusted about my lack of self-restraint.
  

Taking the list into consideration, it's no wonder why it's impossible for me to be inspired in the office. Tuh. It inspires me to go home, that's what it does.

* * * *

The trip home is an experience that presents different inspirations. Of course, there's the *happy thought* that I'm only a few hours away from home (yes, it's takes me at LEAST an hour and a half just to get home). Then there's this nightmare called *rush hour* that I have learned to tolerate by taking in the *excitement* of what's happening around me. That goes to show you how pathetic I am: I think driving along EDSA is exciting.

Thoughts while driving along EDSA (North-bound):

• #1 Thought: GRABE, ang traffic. (no duh!)
  
• Sana nagMRT nalang ako.
  
• Hmmm...That girl in the Pancake House billboard (the one near Estrella) looks a lot like Mumty...
  
• Buti nalang hindi ako nagMRT (after catching a glimpse of the sardine can they call the train). Otherwise, I'll be stuck staring at a sweaty man's armpit all the way from Buendia to Shaw.
  
• Wow, ang ganda ni Claudine Barretto dun sa bagong billboard ng Folded and Hung (BIG improvement from her *I'm-a-sun-goddess* pic from before)
  
• I want to watch the BOND CONCERT!!! (insert feeling of self-pity here)
  
• GRABE, ang traffic (second realization as I reach the crest of the Guadalupe bridge, and see the red lights stretching up to Boni)
  
• I wonder whose kids are those? They're so pretty! (upon glimpsing the Gingersnaps billboard on Guadalupe Bridge.)
  
• What a waste of space. (in passing the Robinsons Apartelle building near Boni)
  
• The traffic will probably let up when I pass Crossing.
  
• Crossing. The traffic will hopefully let up when I pass MegaMall.
  
• MegaMall. Oh, screw it. (At this point, I give up on EDSA and turn into the road leading to ADB Avenue)

After many more swear words later...

HOME. FINALLY.
Home. There's no place like it.
If only I can stay home and veg out whenever I feel like it...Just like the old days. *sigh*
College has spoiled me.

Short hair versus Long hair

If there's one thing I'm vain about, it's my HAIR.

I'm not the type of person who would spend money on hair treatments. Neither am I someone who would spent hours blow-drying or curling my hair before work or before a date. I'm actually the most tamad person when it comes to hair-care.
I simply like my hair. That's how far I go with regards to vanity.

~I like it when people act all surprised when I tell them that No, I did not have my hair colored. EVER.
~I like it when it feels so silky smooth (and when it smells so nice!) after I use Vaseline Shampoo.
~I like it when my younger sister acts all jealous when she brushes my hair and says "Ang daya, bakit ang kapal ng buhok mo?" Hehehe.
~I like it when I put it up in a ponytail and it swishes neatly behind me.
~I like the fact that I don't need to get my hair rebonded or relaxed. Shampoo lang yan. (hahaha, sorry, I couldn't resist)

But I didn't always like my hair.

Back in gradeschool, I only had one hairstyle: a short bobcut. Whenever I went to the parlor, I would always tell the stylist to trim it to just below the ear. THAT was how predictable I was. I let my hair grow beyond my shoulders back in 4th grade...but my hair was so thick that not only did it grow longer...it grew wider as well. Can you say buhaghag? :D

In highschool, I remember getting my first not-a-bobcut haircut in 2nd year...I remember the stylist giving me those layered cuts. That was the in-thing back then. I remember liking my hair even while it was being cut. Have you ever had one of those haircuts wherein it just looked and felt right from the beginning? Well, needless to say, that was one of the best haircuts I ever had. I think that that was when I really bloomed: From nerdy grade-schooler to highschooler with a cool haircut. Haha.

A year after, I felt rebellious. Up till now I still can't remember what compelled me to do it...but the major turning point of my junior year wasn't the prom...it was the day I decided to get a boy's cut. Yup. It was a weird year. Everytime I entered a Jollibee or a Mcdonalds, the crew would greet me with a "Good day, sir!" "Thank you, sir!" That was the year I learned to wear sleeveless blouses and dangling earrings just to make it clear that Hey, I'm a GIRL. That was also the year that I was an aspiring CAT officer. They called me G.I. Jane because of my hair. And because I look like Demi Moore. Ahahaha. Asa pa ako.

Cropped hair has been my general hairstyle for my first four years in college. I remember now that it could get really annoying. The "sirs" I could get used to. But once I try to let it grow longer, it gets into this alanganin stage and it looks really icky. Maybe that's the reason why I kept having it cut off every month. Short hair has its advantages, though:

1. It keeps me cool in the summer time
2. It's wash-and-wear. I don't have to worry about tangles or blow-drying...sometimes I don't even have to comb it. :D
3. I look different from every other long-haired Filipina out there. It's an edge. Is it?
4. It's literally a great weight off your shoulders.

Some people get haircuts when they're depressed or when they're heartbroken, just because it makes them feel light and fresh. I used to get haircuts for the same reason. Once, I was so depressed that I had it cut in a shorter style than usual. Thank God it looked good. :) I only grew my hair long in 5th year college because of the graduation pictures. Hahaha. :) THAT, and because of the fact that I was rarely depressed, and I was NOT heartbroken that year (that's a record, so cheer for me!).

My hair is now well below my shoulders. It's all long and girly...and I'm contemplating on getting it cropped again. I kind of miss having low-maintenance hair. And I guess I'm feeling heavy because of all the stress at work...I feel like I need a change.

Should I go for it?

February

I got this from Risha and Mumty...:) Some of the traits are pretty cool...they fit me to T. Upon seeing the phrase Too sensitive and easily hurt, I was like, "Ahh, ako na nga ito." Hehehe. For the other traits, I guess it's up to other people to judge if they DO describe me or not.

FEBRUARY: Abstract thoughts. Loves reality and abstract. Intelligent and clever. Changing personality. Attractive. Sexy. Temperamental. Quiet, shy and humble. Honest and loyal. Determined to reach goals. Loves freedom. Rebellious when restricted. Loves aggressiveness. Too sensitive and easily hurt. Gets angry really easily but does not show it. Dislikes unnecessary things. Loves making friends but rarely shows it. Daring and stubborn. Ambitious. Aims to realize dreams and hopes. Sharp. Loves entertainment and leisure. Romantic on the inside not outside. Superstitious and ludicrous. Spendthrift. Tries to learn to show emotions.

Stuff like these usually describe me perfectly, because I think I'm fairly predictable (despite the description above that says "changing personality" hehehe). I mean, The description of Pisceans is like a description of LES. Hmmm...Let me dig up that book some day and I'll post the Pisces part here...

In a general sense, I guess some are really far-fetched and silly. I mean, how can ALL people born in February be "Attractive" or "Quiet"? I know a February-born girl who is anything BUT quiet. Hahaha. Eilzabeth Taylor is attractive and she USED to be sexy (she was born on Feb 27, same as I!)...but is she a spendthrift? Is she shy? I think not.

I guess it's pretty silly to generalize people based on what month they're born, or based on what zodiac sign they fall under. But most people have a hard time describing who they are...maybe this sort of thing helps us discover who we may be in some shallow, silly way. :)

All about food

I've recently discovered Singaporean food.

It's kind of ironic that I've only tasted Singaporean food here in the Philippines, instead of having some during my stay in Singapore a few months ago. Our first night there, I remember eating beef wanton noodles at a foodcourt...the next day, we ate lunch at Burger King along Orchard Road...the day after that, we ate dinner at some Thai restaurant...during our last night there, we ate at this cool, new Noodle place. And I ordered some Japanese noodles. Hahaha. *sigh*

Oh well. Better late than never.

I've only eaten in 2 Singaporean restaurants in my life: Rasa in the Araneta Center and Lolo Mao in the Podium. I still can't proclaim to be an expert on their cuisine (especially on the names...haha), but I've tasted the more popular dishes, and I can say that I'm already a fan. I've tasted their different versions of Roti (yummm...I can get addicted to this stuff), I've eaten their Hainanese Chicken Rice, their Satay...and of course, their curry. I've tasted some Bak Kuh Teh in Malaysia...It was really good. :) We even bought some ingredients (but of course, we still can't figure out how to make it). I've tried Lolo Mao's version of Bak Kuh Teh...I didn't like it, though. :(

All of this kind of makes me regret not eating any Singaporean food while in SINGAPORE. I mean, that should be some experience, eh? Authentic Roti...*sigh* I can only imagine...

In the meantime, I think I'll just visit Rasa more often. :) Or Lolo Mao...or Penang...:D

Good guys finish last

I'll be the first one to admit that the "dedma lang" persona I try to preach is all a hoax. I don't even have to say it: my friends know me well enough to confidently say that I never have, and never will be, "dedma." They say that it's a good thing, since being cold or aloof isn't really my style (I think the soft voice and the demure *kuno* smile gives me away). They say that I should extoll my traits of good-naturedness.

Sometimes, though, I feel like being too goody-goody is making me break.

I possess two traits that give me a disadvantage in this dog-eat-dog world: being Over-Sensitive and being Over-Analytical. One separate from the other isn't too bad. One PAIRED with the other is overkill. I torture myself by thinking too much AND feeling too much. The result is not pretty (a mixture of paranoia and neurosis)...and it's torture.

I get hurt by the littlest, most mababaw things...as mababaw as receiving a dumb text message without a *smiley.* Sometimes I get a good laugh afterwards, upon realizing how silly I'm being. Often, I get scarred for life, and I compensate by trying to please everyone, for fear that I might get rejected or criticized again. I try hard not to care, to stop myself from being hurt, hence the mantra "dedma lang."

But it never works. I don't think I'm meant to override my programming. :p

It just saddens me to think that the saying "Good guys finish last," might actually be true, especially at this day and age. Being so "good" is not necessarily a good thing anymore. Sometimes, it actually equates to being a wuss, a geek or a freak...

Sometimes it means getting hurt (yes, even by the littlest things), over and over and over and over again.

Market! Market!

I spent the whole afternoon shopping...At Market! Market! at the Fort! (ok, I just realized that there're too many exclaimation points in that phrase...)

I blew half-a-month's salary on clothes and accessories. :p Ok lang sana eh...but then I remember that I blew the same amount of money on another shopping spree I had last Friday at Glorietta. Damn. My shopping bug is back.

I usually hate shopping. I get tired easily, and I don't like going through the hassle of taking off and putting on clothes during fitting. And I get a headache just perusing all the options laid out before me. I mean, shopping is supposed to be RELAXING! Not tiring, not guilt-inducing, not stressful. :p

Anyway, I enjoyed my shopping weekend, inspite of my sore feet and now-empty wallet. My Glorietta-spree was really cool...pretty surprising that I found stuff that I liked (and that fit me perfectly!) on my first fitting. Finding something on the first try has NEVER happened to me before...especially with pants. Parating bitin eh. But last Friday? Everything I tried on seemed to be made for me! And they were on sale too! :) My Market!Market! spree (sorry, the name really DOES come with exclaimation points!) was sulit also...Not only did I get to buy really cool stuff...I also got to see JayR and Piolo! *eek* Hahaha. Ang jologs ko noh? Pero cute sila eh, bakit ba? :p

Special thanks to Diane for being my Shopping Lucky Charm at Glorietta, and to Larissa (my sister) for not disowning me when I screamed at the top of my lungs during Piolo's appearance. *grin*

Punta kayo sa Market! Market! Kain kayo sa Jollibee hah. Hahahaha. :D

Believe it or not, that "blur" is Piolo. *sigh* And believe it or not, nakitili ako with the masa when the MC introduced him. Hahahah! AAAAH! :D His songs were really baduy...pero cute parin si Piolo...I'd rather look than listen anyway. :D

I saw JAYR in person!!! Hahahaha. Baduy na kung baduy, pero crush ko sha. :D

A shot of the Market! Market! outdoor pavillion...It's really nice there. Sarap tambayan. :D

I hate motorcycles

My car got scratched again this morning.

Some stupid motorcycle rider cut me while I was turning at an intersection. And HE had the nerve to curse at ME. It was totally not my fault (but of course! It never is. :D Hehehe), since I was at the front of the line, and he came out of nowhere, sideswiping me. If only the motorcycle rider wasn't a big, burly man, I would've rolled down my window and let him have it. I. HATE. HIM. Hahaha. Napaka-impassioned ko ba? Hehehe. :)

Poor car. 2 scratches to her name. :( I will seek revenge. However, chances of seeing big, burly motorcycle rider are pretty slim...so I guess I'll just have to keep myself occupied by looking for a scratch-fixer or something. :p

* * * *

Weird experience for the week: I actually heard Holy Mass inside a Jollibee store. Yup. The priest's backdrop was the multi-colored menu of Jollibee...and it was kinda disorienting to see the candle holders with "Jollibee" emblazoned in bright red. You see, yesterday was the blessing of the new Jollibee in Market!Market! <punta kayo! Hehehehe>, and my mom coerced me to attend before work. Ok naman. I got free Tuna Pie! :D

Raf, me and Leah...by height. Hahaha. :) Just kidding, Leah. :)

Me and Leah in front of Haagen-Daazs after eating yummy ice cream (double yummy since it was free! Thanks raf)

High School was fun

Last night I was cleaning my room. Up till now, magulo parin...actually, lalo ata gumulo...(pero teka, that's not the point). I was looking through my "treasure chest" and I came across old letters and my old diaries from HIGH SCHOOL. Yup. Di pa uso Blurty / Blog nun, so de-kamay ang mga entries ko. Hahaha. :)

Grabe. Super LAUGH TRIP!!!

That was the time nung uso pa ang ICQ!!! Oh my God. ICQ was the ultimate in "chat" back then. And IRC, of course. Wala pang YM nun. And before Friendster, ano yung uso? QUICKDOT! Ahahaha. I remember being such an Internet addict back then. I'd stay up till 3 a.m. just to chat. A pretty amazing feat considering that I was still in high school and I had to get up at 5 a.m. everyday. :p

I would literally laugh out loud (while reading my diary) when I came across some weird blast-from-the-past word. I CANNOT BELIEVE I actually used "Jatek" before (It means "excited." For example Grabe, jatek na jatek na ako!") O diba, ang pangit pakinggan??? Hahahaha! :) And we used "Shanaloo" meaning "goodbye." And "TIKLOP" meaning "lagot" or "in trouble" or something like that. WEIRD. :)

Weird, but pretty funny. :)

It felt soooo good to reminisce about high school life. High school was all about fun. Looking back at my ma-drama diary entries about my "love problems" I realize that high school was a piece of cake, especially when compared to my college life or "working" life. :p Hmm...but maybe that's just the gift of hindsight.

It's just SO highschool. And that's fine by me, really. :)

Some things never change. :)

Yesterday I went to Eastwood with a couple of my friends. :) It's such a change for me since I usually only go out with Mark. Hehehe. Leah, Raf and I have been planning to go out for AGES. Walang isang linggo na nakakaraan na hindi kami nagtetext ng ganito...

LEAH: Oy, labas naman tayo, marami akong kuwento
LES: Sige. Movie?
LEAH: Yup. Kaw nalang magtext kay Raf
LES: Oi raf. Movie daw tayo ni Leah
RAF: Sure, just text me the details

It usually starts like that. Then when the details are being ironed out, biglang may isang hindi puwede...or MADALAS, they've seen the movie I want to see. It's never the case of ME already seeing the movie that THEY want to see...kasi hindi na ako nakakapanood ng sine. As in.

Anyway, di nanaman kami nakapanood ng movie last night (late kasi ako sinundo ni Raf eh, sha may kasalanan!), so we just ate at Something Fishy. Afterwards, Raf treated us to Haagen-Dazs ice cream (waaah, that Vanilla Caramel Brownie was sooo good). I met up with Mark after that, and we all trooped up to the Videoke room at the Arcade (well...it's more like Leah and I "trooped" while Mark and Raf "dragged themselves."

Ang saya saya. Leah and I sang "Anywhere For You" for our first song. Haha! Nakakatawa kasi memorized parin namin hanggang ngayon...pati mga second voice alam namin! Hahaha. Napaghahalatang BSB fans (before. Hehe). Mark and Raf were outside (buti nalang) for the first few songs...so by the time they went in, super revved up na kami. Hehehe. :)

It's really nice getting together with old friends. Even if you don't see each other often, there's always this comforting feeling you get when you're with them...parang it assures you that some things never change. And that's a good thing. :)

Magmomovie kami soon. Lilibre kami ni Raf eh. Hahaha. Woohoo!

I'll upload our pictures tomorrow. :D

I've been a member of Blogspot / Blogger (what's the difference? Can anyone tell me the difference?) for 2 years now. More, I think.

I'm resurrecting it now because many have convinced me that Blog is better than Blurty. :D Interface-wise, I guess that's true.

I'll be tweaking my Blog's look soon ( I hope). These standard templates are pretty boring...but editing it can be a little time consuming. And time isn't something I have a lot of nowadays. :(

In the mean time, please check out my old online journal: http://www.blurty.com/users/dedma_lang. My life for the past year or so. :)