"Quotes"

"I remember when, I remember, I remember when I lost my mind. There was something so pleasant about that phase. Even your emotions have an echo in so much space."

-- excerpt from "Crazy" by Gnarles Barkley

* * * *

I'm so busy nowadays that my thoughts are just a series of quotes. Quotes that stand out in my mind while I'm watching a show; lines from songs while listening to the radio; blurbs from books that I'm reading...

"So much of what I see reminds me of something I read in a book, when shouldn't it be the other way around?" (Meg Ryan in You've Got Mail)

Yeah. It should be the other way around. You should be able to read a book, listen to a song, watch a movie, and then clutch your heart and weep internally because it describes your (love)life to a T. It usually takes a song to make you sit up and say, "Hey, I'm feeling that. I can so relate." Think along the lines of Killing Me Softly. It's exactly like Killing Me Softly.

Why do we relate our lives to words that other people have written? Because it's easier to just listen, that's why.

Sit back --> Listen --> Connect.
No complications.
Internal suffering without the hard work.
Other people write it. You just cry over it.

I go around searching for familiar words from unfamiliar people's mouths. Collecting a string of mismatching songs in my head, and playing them back as the soundtrack of my life. Relying on other (unsuspecting) people to tell my story, when they only really want to tell theirs.

Maybe my brain is too tired to generate original thoughts? Or maybe it's another form of deja vu wherein my mind takes comfort in hearing familiar situations in other people's words. Why is it that other people can describe what I am feeling in such a precise way? My words never seem to measure up to the feeling I am trying to emulate. Words never seem to be enough.

"I guess the most important things are the hardest things to say. They are the things you get ashamed of because words diminish them. Words shrink things that seemed timeless when they were in your head, to no more than the living size when they are brought out."

I can blurt out a million words to describe my feelings, my emotions. But there will always be a million more left unsaid, words that remain inside of me. They will be solely mine to feel, exclusively mine to experience.

And that makes me feel better, somewhat.

If it is so easy to snatch quotes from other people, then words can never be truly yours. The emotions I feel: they are mine. And I accept that they are never meant to be described; never meant to be understood by anyone other than me.

Feel-good Crying

There's no doubt about it: my top tear-jerker movie of all time is ARMAGGEDON. No contest.

I was fortunate enough to get home early to catch the flick on Star Movies last night.

Tears were already streaming down my face (like a mini-waterfall! Haha) during the first 30 minutes. Into the half of the movie, I was already emitting weird hiccup-y sounds along with more tears (still a steady waterfall).

Near the end -- Oh, you know that part. The part where Harry (Bruce Willis' character) makes the ultimate sacrifice for mankind, and for his daughter. Up to the part where he says goodbye to her on screen and when she finally calls him "Daddy." -- my hiccup-y sounds turned into full-scale howling. Unabashed bawling. Heart-wrenching sobs.

Hay. That felt really good. Hehe. :)

"What is it about sadness that can be so fulfilling" (The Girls by Lori Lansens)

The Lake House

"What if you found the one you were meant for...But you lived two years apart..."

A movie to look forward to.

The trailer was so sad, romantic...and surreal. Sana ako rin may ganyan...*sigh*

I'll probably be crying while watching this. Hehe.

Ala-Somewhere In Time. Or if you're more attune to the local movies...ala-Moments of Love. :P Wahahaha.

I'm so excited. :)

Getting ready to smile, cry and fall inlove. :)

UCL or bust?

I received my Graduate Application Packet from University College London (UCL) two days ago.

Ang galing.

I have been playing with the idea of Graduate School for some time now. I was thinking of applying to NUS (National University of Singapore), since it's near, it's cheaper, and the weather suits me perfectly. But now, I'm presented with the option of LONDON. UK. The land of royalty. Prince William! Europe! Who am I to pass up that opportunity???

Of course, I still have to get accepted. And that's a really big project to work on. And I'll have to deal with the issue of loneliness and freezing my butt off, when (or IF?) I get accepted into UCL.

I'm scared as heck. But the idea of something new excites me to the core.

Whee. UK, here I come???

*sigh*

Oh, Lonely Night

Friday night, 11:30 p.m. I'm in the car, all alone, driving home from work with my Hale CD as my only companion. "Kung Wala Ka" starts playing, and suddenly, the road seems too long; the night seems too dark and cold; my car feels too big and empty. Bah. Another bout of loneliness has hit me, and I don't like it one bit. :(

Is it the full moon today? Because I have this unexplicable urge to mope.

Hay. It's weird how those Hale songs get to me.

It's the only CD in my car, so Hale is the soundtrack of my life on my mad days, my frustrated days, my pikon days, my smiley days, and most especially my sad days.






Oh well. Tomorrow's another day with my car (and with it, my Hale CD). I wonder what kind of day it will be?

Elliott Yamin is My American Idol

I became a certified Elliott Yamin fan when he sang "If You Really Love Me" during the first semi-finals round. I wasn't able to watch the Hollywood Episodes, so I wasn't aware of this guy's great talent. When I saw him a few moments before he sang, I immediately chalked him up as one of the underdogs, just because of his not-so-stellar looks. And the moment he opened his mouth to sing, I was speechless. Serves me right for judging someone by his appearance. :p

A quote from an article in MSNBC “Whatever he may lack in stage presence, he has more than made up for that in his absolutely authentic, modest and humble personality,” said his cousin, Chuck Lessin, who went to see Yamin perform last month. Ah, how true! Humble Elliott, God bless his good soul. :)

He's obviously the underdog in American Idol 5, especially when compared to Katharine McPhee and Chris Daughtry (who both have great talent...and they're not so hard to look at, either), or to Taylor Hicks (who has his "unique" look and personality doing wonders for his popularity ratings). But EVERY SINGLE WEEK, Elliot keeps on surprising everyone. His fan base seems to be growing every week! It's too bad I can't vote, because I'll spend a fortune just making sure that he wins the Idol crown. :D

Napapangiti ako everytime he sings (haha, cheesy). And even though most of his songs are unknown to me, I end up enjoying each and every one his performances. Come to think of it, there's no other Idol finalist that I look forward to watching perform than Elliott. :)

Another quote...ah, this is so cute: “I always said Elliott was my little lost boy because he never found anything that made him happy,” said Claudette Yamin. “He just never found his niche. And, I guess this is it. I guess this it what he’s been striving for all his life.”

Hooray for Elliott Yamin! Ang galing galing niya, ang bait bait pa (hehe, close kami?).

I really really hope he wins. :)

Mushy Mushy Love Quotes

I've been looking for quotes all evening (up till the morning) for a Powerpoint presentation I'm preparing for my parents' Silver Wedding Anniversary. I've seen lots of really nice lines...Let me share some of them with you...

Kinda mushy, some.

But, oh, how they ring true.

* * * *

Love is an act of endless forgiveness, a tender look which becomes a habit. Peter Ustinov (1921 - 2004)

They say old habits die hard. Sometimes, though, when you're so used to doing them, you take them for granted. And instead of feeling comfortable, it feels tiresome. Love shouldn't be a habit; there should always be constant improvement.

But then, tender looks are always nice. :)

* * * *

How we treasure (and admire) the people who acknowledge us!
Julie Morgenstern, O Magazine, Belatedly Yours, January 2004

Ever notice how some people are so easily swayed by a kind word or a flattering gesture? I think I'm one of them. Is it really so bad to feel warm and fuzzy all over when someone gives an extra effort to show you that you are special? Hehe. Hindi sa KSP ako ah...

* * * *

Think about a woman. Doesn't know you're thinking about her. Doesn't care you're thinking about her. Makes you think about her even more.
Martin Sage and Sybil Adelman, Northern Exposure, The Bumpy Road to Love, 1991

Haha! Unrequited love. The story of everyone's lives, whether you're single or in a relationship. :/

* * * *

I believe love is primarily a choice and only sometimes a feeling. If you want to feel love, choose to love and be patient.
Real Live Preacher, RealLivePreacher.com Weblog, December 16, 2002

Not many people are patient. Actually, patience is a scarce thing nowadays when everything is so convenient and instantaneous. People should re-learn how to wait...It's in that time that you get to appreciate what you have; it is when you figure out how hard you should work to get at what you are striving to get.

* * * *

Love isn't a decision. It's a feeling. If we could decide who we loved, it would be much simpler, but much less magical.
Trey Parker and Matt Stone, South Park, Chef Aid, 1998

Even if this quote is a contradiction to the one before it, it is still true (and isn't that what love is? A constant contradiction? Misunderstood? Unpredictable? Confusing?).

Who Else?

A week ago, I found out that a family friend of ours, who's 14-years old, doesn't believe in God. Or in a god. A 14-year old atheist?

It's difficult to understand how there are some people out there who don't believe that God - or any other higher being - exists.



How uninspiring it must feel to see beautiful sunsets, the turquoise sea, and silvery moonlights, thinking that they are products of atoms instead of believing that they are miracles.

How unfulfilling it must be like to live your life day after day, believing that there is no heaven to look forward to after death.

And how lonely it must feel to suffer, to feel pain, to cry, thinking that you are all alone in your grief.

For who else, but God (or the god you believe in), can really be with you in all your sad moments?
Who else, but God, knows the exact moment when your heart breaks?
Who else, but God, knows exactly how it feels?
Who else, but God, understands?

[*Disclaimer: This entry is not meant to be a religious stand. More of...an emotional reflection, really. :) And it isn't meant to condescend on other religions. The term "God" refers to any higher being that any religion believes in. Leni, linagyan ko na ng disclaimer kasi baka mga hindi ko na kakilala ang magcomment, mas mahirap. Haha. Iklaro ko lang kasi baka magka-scandal. Hahaha.]

AI, You Make Me Smile

Elliott Yamin
So he's not the best looking
person in the bunch.
But when he sings...
Ahhh.:)
It's refreshing (coool...).
It makes ME smile.

His mom says he has a
GOOD SOUL.
And he really looks like
he has a good soul.
Cool and Sensitive Elliot.
You have GOT to love that. :)

Katharine McPhee
Pretty pretty Katharine
with the amazing cheekbones
the sweet smile
and the unbelievable voice.

Each week she just gets
better and better
(and prettier and prettier).
Watching her perform
is AMAZING. GREAT. AWESOME.

No wonder her dad cries
everytime she sings. :)

Have you got the McPheever??






Vote for them puhleeeeaase
(because I can't. Hehe.)




Icons by laughtur
Check out her site. She's got great stuff...
Where do these people find time to make really nice graphics?!
Gimme some of that free time, please.

Lost March

March update, published below (see "Blogger Delinquent" post).

Matagal na kasi naka-Draft form...ngayon ko lang natapos. Hehehe. :)

Summmmeeeeerrrrr.

Don't ask me why my forehead is all scrunched up, though. I think I was trying to figure out how to blog about Palawan.

Words are simply not enough.

Chronicles of Palawan coming soon (I hope).

The Case of the Lost Bikini Top

We're leaving for Palawan in a few hours (8 hours, to be exact).

My feeling of excitement is gone, and it is annoyingly replaced by a feeling of anger and anxiety.

My favorite bikini top is lost.

My sister used it last week for her trip to Batangas, and now, she's not sure if she was able to bring it home.

Great. $24 (for the friggin' top only!) down the drain (and out to sea...).

They'd better find it, or else...

Or else I'll be running topless in Palawan. Harhar. Just kidding.





This sucks.

Over Overtime

It's 2:30 A.M.

Still in the office.

No car. Will take a taxi or hitch a ride with someone.

Will get home at around 3:30 A.M.

Have to leave house at 6:30 A.M. to get to Makati by 8:00 A.M.

(Should I sleep? If I do, will I wake up on time?)

Have a meeting with client at 8:30 A.M.

Hoping I don't accidentally yawn while presiding.





This is SO not good.

Zzzzzz....

Frustrated Web Designer. :(

Aaaaah! I've spent (almost) the whole day in front of this computer, trying to fix my blog. I've looked at hundreds of web tutorials, thousands of blog inspirations...but did I get any work done? NADA.

I'm sad. :(

Gone are the days of simple NOTEPAD HTML EDITING. *sigh* That's what I used to do, anyway. Now there are all sorts of template generators. And when I try to edit the HTML, I have to weave through all sorts of useless tags.

I was able to do a pretty header, at least. I just can't figure out how to place it on my site. Whenever I try, it doesn't fit! And the simple "width" or "height" parameters won't work. Whyyyy?!



I know it doesn't look that great. But it's simple enough for my taste. For now.

I saw this really reaally really GREAT blog. Great graphics. Very streamlined layout. Gaaah. She's my idol. I want to make headers just like she does. *pout* Check out Karen Cheng's Blog. I am jealous. I admire her. She makes me want to become a better blogger. Heehee. :)

help me.

Blogger Delinquent

I have been a very bad blogger. I haven't updated this thing in ages. And the blogger gods from above are out to punish me. "Try squeezing in all of the note-worty events of last month into one blog entry, why dontcha!" they say. They're right, though. That's going to be difficult.

A LOT (a heckuva lot) has happenend in the month of March, and I will have a hard time catching up. Words are not enough to describe all the nice (exciting, fun, sweet, memorable, totally out-of-this-world) things that have happened the last month.

March 2006 is definitely a month to remember.

* * * *

March 3, Friday - Serendra Site Visit
The whole group in charge of the Serendra and Columns projects (Group 2!) trooped to the Serendra construction site for a long-overdue site visit. We've all worked on Phase 1, Phase 2A, Phase 2B (and recently, Phase 3), at least once in our stay in RMJM, and it was befitting that we all saw the fruits of our labor. Reality check: It was a huuuge project. Mega-residential complex. And we drew all of it? How awesome is that?! :)

March 4, Saturday - Girls' Night Out!
Diane, Denise, Leslie and I (Lesley. Hehe) ate at the Old Swiss Inn to catch up on all the office chismis and all the happenings in our lives (since we haven't seen much of Dianiepot ever since she resigned...) Pepper Steak, Swiss Potato Pancake, Pesto...and Toblerone Fondue! *yummy* Needless to say, we all had to loosen our belts a notch. Afterwards, we all decided to walk to the Manila Peninsula Hotel to use their lovely bathrooms (all for Denise's benefit. Haha).

And who do I bump into? My Tita Beth and Ninong Jimmy (my mom's brother)! I'm spoiled silly by those two. So they offer to treat us for drinks, coffee...anything! Cool as they were, they had us stay at a separate table, far far away (they had their own barkada gimik hehe). My Ninong suggested that we order the Pen Pals special. In the picture, it looked like a decent sized sundae...but when I saw the waiter coming with our order, I was surprised to see how HUGE it was. "Shit. Ang laki!!!" The container was the size of a large fishbowl, and it had ice cream twice as high. We were able to finish only 3/4 of it, I think.

Ang takaw rin namin eh, noh. Dinner + Fondue (lots of it) + Ice cream (a gallon?!). It was fun. I hit the gym the day after as an attempt to burn it all off. Gaah!

March 10, Friday - UP Arki Grand Alumni Homecoming
It's always fun to go back to UP. I saw my old professors, my old classmates; I saw all sorts of friends: close friends, terribly-missed friends, reliable friends, super friends (sorry :<...), fake friends. I saw all sorts of "exes": ex-boyfriend, ex-crushes, ex-suitors, ex-friends. I saw a lot of people trying to be someone other than who they were in college; and I saw people who were simply trying too hard (tsk tsk). I laughed alot, reminisced a lot, ate a lot (hehe). I had a lot of fun. :) March 11, Saturday - Diane's Bridal Shower
After picking up some yummy sisig at Aysee's in Pasig, I went straight to Sunette Tower in Makati for Diane's Bridal Shower. The guests weren't there yet as I arrived 4 hours early, so Diane and I watched some TV and talked. :) I ate a lot: sisig, KFC chicken, carbonara, cake, and Brooklyn Pizza! We kept hinting that we had a surprise coming...a "special guest." Diane thought we had invited a gigolo (wahaha). We did give her a kinky surprise...in the form of a cake in the shape of a penis. Ahahaha! The look on her face was priceless. We took a lot of crazy pictures with that cake...pictures that will be kept secret for fear of blackmail. Haha! ;)

March 18, Saturday - Oathtaking Ceremony
My proud moment. The day I am officially sworn into the association as a professional architect. Yaaaah. :) It was held at the Grand Ballroom of the Philippine Plaza Hotel. Since my dad had an IFAWPCA event in the same hotel later that evening, my family booked a room there for the night.

I wore this really really nice, shimmery black cocktail dress (it cost only P700...it was on sale at Cinderella! Haha!). Got a lot of stares because of the cleavage-bearing cut, I think. It was pretty brave (crazy) of me to wear a dress like that...but it was gorgeous! And for a low price, too. Haha. :)

It was a happy happy day because all 3 of us (Michelle, Janrey and I)...the only people in our batch to take the boards this January; study buddies at every coffee shop convenient for us; blockmates, friends and motivators...we all passed! And so we were all there: happy, smiling, proud, still in a state of disbelief. :) MLV and Dean Luis were also there, acting like stage mothers, taking pictures of us at every opportunity. Hehe.

(Aaahhh! Architect na ako! *jump and scream for joy*)

March 25, Saturday - Jomari & Diane's Wedding
I can't believe she's married! I was a secondary sponsor, and we were lining up for the march down the aisle when I saw Diane descend her horse-drawn carriage (Hahaha. Naks). I was crying from that moment up until she walked down the aisle to meet her groom. *sigh* She looked radiant. And her smiles weren't her usual conscious-skewed ones (you were the one who said it, Di, not me. Hehe)...her smiles looked as if they could stay on her face forever (although that would be really weird).

Congratulations Di and Jom! You two look lovely together.

"As the priest said...it's all in God's Plan. The 2 of you...how you met, how you fell in love, how you are loving each other now, and how you will spend forever together...it's all in the Plan. I wish for you all the best things there are. But most of all, I wish that whenever you have questions about love and life, you will find the answers in each other." -- Speech ko yan! Napaiyak ko yung bride. Hehehe. Love you, Diane. Mwah!

March 28, Tuesday - Larissa's Highschool Graduation
Back to my alma mater 6 years later to witness my baby sister graduate from highschool. *sniff* When I graduated from highschool, she was just in Grade 4. Nye! :P

Naiyak ako nung inaannounce yung mga awards (yeah, I'm a crybaby...). Naisip ko kasi, sana ako rin, nagka-award. Hehe. Not for my personal achievement, but for my parents. To make them proud of me. :) Sayang lang. Oh well. It was also very sentimental to see all those young ladies in their last big event with each other...reminds me of my highschool experiences. *sigggghh*

Highschool was nice. College was nice. Adult life sucks in comparison. :(

* * * *

MY MEMORABLE MONTH OF MARCH!
The End.
Mid-April na pala. Wow.
Memorable April, coming up. :)

Just Gotta Love Feb!

It's been almost 2 weeks since my birthday? Wow. Seems like I'm still on a high from everything that has been happening in the month of February. :)

And now, March has come along, bringing with it a flurry of activities that I can't seem to keep up with. So let me just RAVE about my February, about the 2 big events in the past month, before my blog gets left behind on the news...

BIG EVENT #1
Board Examination Results! (Feb. 6, 2006)
Words cannot begin to describe how happy, relieved, estatic, blessed, & overwhelmed I felt when I saw my name in the list of successful board examinees for the Architecture Licensure Exam. Life began to change right then, right there..

BIG EVENT #2
My Birthday Party! (Feb. 26, 2006)
A day before my actual birthday. My loving parents (Ma and Pa, you're the best!) planned a party at our house: A birthday party, as well as a celebratory party for me. I thought it was going to be a small get-together, just like the usual family gatherings in the past. But they surprised me with all the meticulous preparations! It was catered, and even my friends were invited. Not the usual Sunday brunch I was used to. :) I had a LOT of fun...very unlike me, as I totally abhor hosting parties. Hehe. (Pictuuuuures!!!)

* * * *

For a time, I was worried that my February would not wrap up in the way that I wanted it to. I had a few down times during the middle of those 2 BIG events...but thankfully, God hasn't let me down. He still gave me the best birthday month ever. :)

I just gotta love February. :)

This is for you...

When It Was Over
by Sarah Groves

When it was over and they could talk about it
She said there's just one thing I have got to know
What in that moment when you were running so hard and fast
Made you stop and turn for home
He said I always knew you loved me
even though I'd broken your heart
I always knew there'd be a place for me
to make a brand new start

Oh love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Make us whole

When it was over and they could talk about it
They were sitting on the couch
She said what on earth made you stay here
When you finally figured out what I was all about
He said I always knew you'd do the right thing
Even though it might take some time
She said, Yeah, I felt that and that's probably what saved my life

Oh love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Love wash over a multitude of things
Make us whole

There is a love that never fails
There is a healing that always prevails
There is a hope that whispers a vow
A promise to wait while we're working it out
So come with your love and wash over us

* * * *
Download mp3 here

Late reaction :)

yaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaaay!!!
aaaaaaaaaaaaaahhhhhhhh!!!
ohhhhmyyyygoooooosshh!!!
yaaaaaahoooooooooooooo!!!

I'm happy.
Obviously. :)

I passed. I PASSED!!!
I am officially an architect.

Big weight off my shoulders.
Big smile on my face. :)

Introducing: Mac-Mac!

A few months ago, as some of you may know, our family lost Kobe, our beloved, makulit doggie, who was named after an NBA player just because of the color of his fur. :D My mom, seeing how devasted we were, tried to make things better by bringing a new dog into our home...We've named him Macintosh (Macaroni, Machiavelli, Macadoodle) or Mac, and he has brought with him (aside from lots of fur and lots of saliva...and not to mention poo) happiness and lots of love. :D Hehe.

I haven't properly introduced him here in my blog yet. So now, I think, is a nice time to do it, since I am absolutely brimming with cutesy love for this cutesy pug (Ah, it kinda rhymes! Haha. I have it bad).

And heeeere's my Mac-Mac....

Who's a happy doggie? :)

I love this dog.

Mac-Mac-y, my puggy-doggy, is my source of happiness. When I have a really bad day, seeing him as soon as I get home erases all the negative thoughts in my head. After all, how can one still have "negative thoughts" when one is preoccupied with baby-talking a dog? :p Hehe.

He sleeps with me in my room; he slobbers all over my bedroom floor; he has chewed off parts of my baseboard and my wall (yeah, he scratches the paint off with his teeth); and he has won me over with his puppy-dog looks and his winning doggie smile. :) And his weird antics are plus cutie points too. :)

Adorable isn't he? :)

Ahhh, nakakagigil. :) I love you, Macamaca!

Fanatic Me

Got this from Anton's blog.

Since I'm still on a BSB hangover (I haven't been doing anything, except stay at home and update my blog. Can you really blame me?), I thought that this would be a fun way to reminisce about my old (or still raging?) obssessions.

I'll have to warn you, though. Some of my answers are really baduy. :)

* * * *

1. Post a list of up to 20 books/movies/anime/TV shows/video games/etc. that you've had an obsessive fannish love of at some time in your life.
2. Have your friends list guess your favorite character from each item (yeah, mag-reply kayo!)
3. Post in your own journal. Not a rule really... more like a suggested course of action.

In no particular order...

1. Well, the Backstreet Boys should be an obvious answer. :) Top 1 too!
2. Meteor Garden (I was pretty late, though. Got hooked on the show when it was laos na. Wahaha)
3. F4 (Of course it has to follow MG! They have different characters naman eh. Haha)
4. Miki Loves Yuu
5. Powerpuff Girls
6. American Idol (season 4)
7. A Series of Unfortunate Events (the books)
8. The OC
9. Pinoy Big Brother (hehe. Was able to watch only after Sam got evicted, though)
10. Harry Potter books / movies
11. C.S.I (Las Vegas)
12. The Phantom of the Opera (the movie)

* * * *

My friends say that I will always be a fanatic. I guess that's a good thing? That means I get really passionate about things? Or does that mean that I care too much about things that don't (or shouldn't) really matter? Ah well. You decide.

Concert Videos!

I've finally uploaded my videos from the Backstreet Boys concert. Yay. :)

The videos have become really grainy after I uploaded them to Vimeo...but they still look ok, I think. :p The sound isn't as sabog as I initially expected them to be, so that's a good thing. :) I've only uploaded 4 videos so far...I have a lot more, but I'll upload them on Sunday nalang when I have more time. Hehe. Sorry. :)

Check out the videos here. :)